Doko (Poland, 45yo)
I haven`t been at Antaiji for quite a long time now. Since 2 years ago when I entered Myokoji senmon sodo I visited only once for short visit during Miyaura Roshi memorial service. But Antaiji is all the time in my mind and heart.
I thought that maybe write little bit about my training here at Myokoji. It might be interesting for people who don`t know the current state of Japanese Soto Zen school.
My prime aim to come here was to obtain certification as a official Soto Zen priest. But I also wanted to learn about aspects of Soto Zen tradition which are not available at Antaiji.
As I had already known more less how it would look like I had few crisises during my time here. Most of the unsuis enter sodo to get licence and inherit their fathers temples which are more like a business place where they work. And this is true for all the sodos including Eiheiji where train at one time even over 200 unsui. They are not interested in zazen or studying Buddhism. So most of them have hard time during everyday zazen or especially during sesshin which by the way are here only twice a year. One Rohatsu sesshin in December and one in February commemorating Buddhas Parinirvana.
But not all the monks are like that there are few who became monks for other reasons. And these are somehow connected with Antaiji. One of them you might know - Maeda-kun. He is now Tesshu. The first character of his name is tetsu which means philosoper which I think very accurately conveys his personality. Those who know him might have a good laugh about this... But somehow monks who are interested in zazen are little bit outside of the group.
When I talked to Okumura Shohaku last August he told me that when he went sodo over 30 years ago he also was like that.
But I have learn many things here ... which most I may never use... but it was anyway interesting to learn these ancient Buddhist rituals. My point of view on transmission of Buddhism to the West is that we first have to learn the old tradition and then maybe to change or adjust something. To say from the start that all the old stuff is just rubbish and make something new based only on personal opinion of some person might lead to gross misunderstanding as it is the case in many places in the West.
Anyway I found quite a few people here who had connection with Antaiji. First is the abbot Yamamoto Roshi who trained with Uchiyama Roshi at Antaiji in seventies. He is very fond in Uchiyama Roshi teachings and propagates them. He helps to reprint Uchiyama Roshi`s books which are always available at Myokoji to take for free. Second is Godo Roshi Honda Tekifu who also trained at Antaiji. He is very inspiring person. I met him before in Poland when he came with Murakami Kosho Roshi to lead sesshin. Also Ino Roshi trained over 20 years ago with Miyaura Roshi in Senmon Sodo at Nagoya. So somehow through this people I can learn some spirit of Antaiji`s tradition.
Currently I am shusso that means head monk of the winter training period. This month I will have Hossen shiki ceremony at Myokoji which means Dharma combat. This is an ancient tradition which in the old times was a challenge for a monk. Anyone might ask him a question concerning Dharma. Today it is kind of ceremony which every monk have to go through to become fully qualified priest. For me it is anyway quite challenging because it is all in old Japanese which even current Japanese don`t understand. Besides these mondos are koans and when I asked some of the monks about meaning they just shrug the shoulders. One of them said that it is proverb in Japanese that some thing is like mondo. It means that somebody has no clue what it is all about ;) But I try do my best.
Always when I sit in zazen here I am supported by memory of Antaiji zazen. By the way I am only one of the two persons who try to sit everyday here. The other is a monk who also became monk because of vocation. We somehow trying to go against the current of mainsteam.
I wish you all the best in your practice and hope to visit Antaiji in the near future to sit zazen and do samu together.
